Damn. For the first time ever, I am committing a cardinal sin when writing an article: using the word “I” and saying the “D’ word. It’s tradition for a graduating Observer writer to write in first person for their final article. However, this isn’t goodbye yet; it’s more like a fresh beginning: welcome to Paws for Thoughts.
Starting this year, the Editor-in-Chiefs (EICs), Ha-Yeon (ew) and I, will alternate each month between writing about whatever we want. I’m going first, mainly because Ha-Yeon forced me to. I always felt that writing for the Observer has given me a platform to express my thoughts and bring topics that genuinely resonate with me to light. Now with this new, unlimited, creative freedom, it feels as if I have this greater power, and with greater power comes greater responsibility. Don’t worry Bulldogs, I won’t expose you all (yet).
So let’s get started, shall we? I know how cliche this will sound, but high school really does fly by. It feels like yesterday I was lying in bed getting ready to log on to my PE class. Now, as a senior, waking up early doesn’t seem to apply anymore. But really, where’d all the time go? Since when was waking up for a 7:45 a.m. class a thing?
In all seriousness, I was excited to be a senior (note the past tense). When I drove into the bus loop a week before school started to pick up my senior shirt, it felt awesome seeing all my old teachers and the empty hallways waiting to be filled. I was going into my final year of high school, had finally became EIC and had gotten my own student parking lot spot. All my friends said I was crazy for me to say that I was looking forward to senior year, and now looking back, I was crazy. But for a moment, it felt like I was on cloud nine, though that feeling only lasted for ONE day of school. That was when reality hit, and I realized “there is no light at the end of the tunnel” (Boppana). To all the English teachers reading this, are you happy that I cited my source correctly?
What doesn’t help is not only the work but the pressure; the pressure from everyone. You know that meme with the cartoon dog sitting inside a house that’s being burned alive, but the dog just sits there and says “This is fine”? That’s WCHS in a nutshell. The only difference is that year-by-year—we’re not adding water to the fire—we’re adding gas.
But yes, senior year sucks. It doesn’t help that we have assignments pouring in left and right, and in the meantime, we’re trying to finish our infinite college essays. Suddenly, there’s a heap of expectations on our shoulders that just keep piling up. We have to maintain good grades. We have to show we’re taking rigorous courses but need a lighter workload. We have to continue our extracurriculars. We actually have to understand “Hamlet.” We need to get our college apps done before the deadline. At this point you get it, it’s a marathon with no finish line in sight.
We’re constantly under pressure, comparing ourselves to our peers, wondering if we’re doing enough, and fearing that someone else might snag our spot at a college. We stress over who’s applying early to which schools and where our friends are also applying. On top of that, your parents, with the best intentions, are nudging you minute-by-minute to finish that college essay you’ve been behind on for weeks while magically keeping those grades afloat. Simultaneously, you have to find time to go to Homecoming and hang out with friends. We understand we’re behind and losing motivation, but cut us some slack! Constantly reminding us won’t help – it’s just more gas to that fire.
It’s frustrating. There’s no denying that. But in the meantime, go outside, take a walk and do something that’s actually fun and not related to college. Every week, just think of one thing you did that was fun, and if you can’t think of anything, what are you doing? Don’t forget the silver lining: we’re going to be laughing about all this by the time school ends, and college apps will finally end in checks calendar two months. It doesn’t seem like much time, but seniors, lock in, good luck and let the game begin.
P.S. Ha-Yeon, onto you next month 🙂
